Dear Jules…

Asthma is now out of control and I’m back on steroids.

I reckon the secret state have done this to me because I write for NoworNever!

They haven’t set me up for ‘entering’ anyone without their consent however which I’m shocked about, obviously not worthy enough…

They could actually have used their brains and got me for ‘entering people’ while in such a state that I had no recollection of said entrance the next morning though…

I’d a come quietly for that one…

How’s the Canelazo in the Embassy? Don’t you find it bucks like a bronco without a hint of a fight back when you go ‘dead out cold’  bang at bottle? A proper ripper that one, definitely not for the birds! Especially gobby opinionated ones who complain…

Anyway, don’t worry about the CIA now they’re allegedly after you. It’s a shame you had no idea it was coming, but we have a plan…

It’s the dolphins see? The ones they use to explode mines? The Delta Force ones? Well we’ve had a word…and they’re definitely on your side! Although they do reckon getting yourself renditioned to Gitmo in order to avoid rape charges is a bit dum, especially when you hold world peace and freedom in the palm of your hands, they’ll be covering the bays and beaches on your arrival. Listen up for the various instructions…they’re long winded but have been redacted and go like this…

“Squeek dash squeek dash squeek”.

Bit of a ball breaker I know. Sorry about that.

Listen, a word of advice. It’s about Gorgeous George…well he’s turning out to be a bit of a player, you know, a hit with the ladies?

Dump him Jules, he’s a wrong’un. He’s got a mustache and reminds me of our interim Sonia….if ya know what I mean 😉

Yo mofo!

Bye for now saviour!


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